i shall blog maybe tmr? or monday aft trng or smth.with pics uploaded cos right now its 1.05am and i'm freaking tired. and my right shoulder hurts right now, tried not thinking abt the pain but HARD. guess its the abrasion and impact during trng's 4on4. plus aft that i gei kiang go play ball at 108 until 11 though im super tired. and i just played and beared with the pain and soon forgot abt it. but came back aft that. sucky!

I guess it'll be fine after some time, hoping it wont affect any of my trngs.WELL I GUESS ITS GNA BE FINE TMR... *giving the bitterest smile ever*

ok. i so dont dare to move my right shoulder too much now. i think it'll be fine tmr. and yes my right thigh hurts too.impact too i think. shit, perhaps it's all my clumsiness. I'M TOO CLUMSY LA, NO ONE ELSE TO BLAME IT ON.SO I GUESS I REALLY NEED TO PRACTISE MORE, AND STANDING MORE FIRMLY. SIGH SUCKYYYYYYYYYYY ):

anticipating a msg to show some care, but it nv came. guess you're just having fun out there, i dont blame you. i blame myself.

Sigh. Today's a damn tiring day for me.
Wells, trng was relatively ok. Fun actually.
Reached home at abt 9plus. Omg. I seriously think Jeremy is right. Kinda no life seh! Mon, Tues, Thurs and Sat trng. plus until so late everytime.Only can come back home, no energy to do work somemore. I'm glad for Wed, Fri and Sun, yet I have to do work. Suck la. JC life is just sooooo. URGHHH.

Today's sky is prettyyyyyyyyyyy ((:
oh yes, and we saw a rainbow, but cldnt take a picture of it when it was obvious bcos we were trng halfway. The rainbow was gone when we had our break. HEARTPAIN. and the rainbow so reminds me of you, wishing you were there to take that beautiful scene for me, wishing you were a beautiful rainbow that wld not disappear. Sigh.

hmmm prettaye sky today (: Orangey clouds by the sunset. Then it slowly turned purple. Too bad I cldnt take the pic and post it up ): Oh wells. I'm damn lazy to do anything now, cos my finger's still swollen and I still cldnt write )))))):
Shit la, I so don feel good now. ALL YOUR FAULT LAH. bleah.

I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE. PI IS JUST SO SHIT!!!!!!!!!!

AND I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE. YOU'RE JUST OUT TO MAKE ME JEALOUS OF PPL ARND YOU, MAKING ME WISH I WAS THE ONE. AHHHH FUCK.

TOTALLY STRESSED OUT AND GOING BONKERS.

screwed and tired totally. Ran during P.E, really wanted to slp in class. Trng till 8plus and went to 7eleven for MASHED POTATO haha so cool. oh wells. Homed and bathed and online. oh wells. talking to my dearest J now. though she shld feel sad, but i think i feel even worse than her. DA BIAN LA.

It has been exactly a month.

Haha, it's so not the right time to get emo. Oh wells, everyone arnd me's getting attached, or living sweetly and happily with their partners.Making me so ENVIOUS. so da bian can! J and me - the poor kids who wants our happiness, but there's nth we can do abt it, right J! Haha, nvm nvm. we'll meet up real soon dude! and you, tell me to cry when i see you, so you can lend me your shoulder. Aww, that's damn sweet of you and i really appreciate that too ok J! (:
Wo men yi qi JiaYou bah! (:

Ok, hello everyone! Heh. I woke up like super early today. Considered early for like a SUNDAY! haha woke up when my alarm rang at 9. then went back to slp and woke up at 930. and realised i only have like 30min to get ready and reach Bugis. Heh washed up and got changed. Jy said she'll give me 15min grace and if I am late I'll have to treat her to breakfast. I chionged out of the house and went over Bugis to meet Gays.

Met Qi at control station and went over to Toast Box. Jy and Wee arrived subsequently. TSK JIA IS STILL THE LATEST. The toast was relatively ok, but not the egg noodles. The noodles's like instand noodles, the soup is damn salty, the sausage too! The only thing that is ok abt that bowl is, egg white! Heh. So, we were so bored that we decided to go play pool. Hilarious, but fun! (:

Yep so Qi and I parted with them after that and Qi went to celebrate her mum's bday while I took bus to Sy's hse. Got my finger done and slacked arnd in her hse. Left abt 4plus I guess? Went to my grandparents' place and crapped with Ps. Sorry but PeiSze and I just can't help bullying PeiSin. Talked and had dinner then their dad fetched me from their hse back home and Ps tagged along so we sort of crapped on my way home too! Yay. Reach home at like 9plus. Bathed and online till now. I wna watch Sky of Love so badly cos everyone's telling me it's touching. And some idiot's being mean lor! TSK. BLEAHHHHHHHHHHH.WALAO idiottttttttttttttttttttttttt.

RAHHHH whatever I need to ice my swollen-like-a-pig's-trotter finger and also rest soon. I'm tired boo. Pics up soon! (aft Teng passed me my cable)
Nights ppl (:

Hmmm. alright. Met Zihui at noon time and slacked arnd in my hse, watching kungfu dunk dvd. Then proceeded to SBC to watch game. Then she left and I slacked arnd at home. T-net trng was cancelled bcos of the stupid rain and coach fell sick :/

Teng did a surprise visit at my hse and asked me to dinner with her and Ivan. So met them downstairs and bus-ed to SP. Waited for Ivan's fren, Joanne, then had Subway.Heh I had 3 super filling cookies! Sense the satisfaction? (:

Heh while waitin for his friend, we were totally crapping there and camwhored cos Ivan was saying that we havent taken any proper meals/photos though we have been friends for like 9yrs?! And I totally agree with that. So the 3 of us were gg crazy with all the super duper cold jokes that Ivan had. FAINTS! Really wanted to rightleftupdown him. Teng wanted to slap him in the middle too. Heh. And while having Subway, the cold jokes continued and the 3 of us really cant stand him la! oh yes. Smth really really funny happened while we were there. OMG. phone call! Hilarious, serious.

Walked back to Aljunied and Teng came over my hse and slacked arnd. Then till abt 11plus, MalanStone came up my hse and slacked. Haha they looked at the pics I posted for the previous post and almost fainted cos of all the unglamness and the roundfaces! Heh.And they so pray that no one reads my blog but I'm aware of silent readers! HOHO. They just left some time ago at abt 12plus? Think they're gg Mac to study overnight. So reminds me of O lvls. And reminded me that I've been slacking arnd cos I cldn't hold a pen and write with my 4th finger ): damn sad. wanted to do Maths ):

Alright it's 1.20am now. I shld go slp cos I'm meeting Gays in the morning for breakfast at like Bugis at 10am?! Imagine Wong said 9am at first. Wondered what made her said that. Omg heh. Aye! Nights ppl (: LOVES (:

And to J, I knw you don't read my blog. But I just wna say that don't feel sad ok? Please take good care of yourself and don't end up being like me. Don't ill-treat your own health! We'll catch up either this coming week or when you come back from your HK trip aye! Things will get better and the same line, Just let nature runs its course k? Jiayou (:

Hahaha, ok. so wanted to go see sinseh for my finger. ended up playing ball for a while downstairs with priscilla and teng? then wanted to go topone ktv in the evening, but priscilla cldnt make it suddenly then end up gg bugis with stones! haha yes. Marianne and Tengy! haha Bought 720 tix for StepUp2. and bought chilli crab fries and the doughnut-youtiao thingy to cinema.cldnt finish la. damn filling. AND STEPUP2 IS DAMN HOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT (:

so coolio the way they dance. So makes me wna take up dance agn. Haha. WELLLLLLLLLLLS. HMMM,. shopped arnd and bought some stuffs lah. THE MOST HILARIOUS THING FOR TODAY ARE THE PHOTOS WE TOOK. Camwhored/laughed like mad women in Bugis and also on bus80. with everyone staring at us, paisehed indeed but who cares cos we're having lotsa fun (: yay i love them. haha. shitou men!

ok let the pics do the talking aye! (:

At Diva trying on all the blingblings!

So random!

Look at her unglamness pls. Trying to copy that ugly lion. tsk.

Hahaha yes we're trying to copy Mickey.

Trying to be a model! Heh.

Yay SHITOUs (:

Was trying to act fierce but burst out laughing! Heh.

The most glamourous shot she took for the whole night! the one below. hahaha.

Trying to act rocker. tsktsk.

Did you see any resemblance between the Advertisement and the both of them?!

In the bus! with all the funneh random shots (:

See! Teng was trying to take some artistic shots and ended up like these!

Don't ask me who it is. I don't even knw! HEH.

Yayyyyyy We had so much fun (: Hahaha Crazy bunch of ppl and I guess that's how we communicate. hahaha STONING!

A last picture to end off the day! Yay a nice and full Stone Family portrait!

Can you believe it? I actually stayed at home from morning till aftn to complete GP and maths. Haa, now left with part of chem to complete. And all of a sudden, I just have the urge to complete it! Hahaha.

Got prepared and left house at abt 5 to go to Dhoby Ghuat to meet Jy. Shopped arnd at The Cathay and I still failed to stop Jy from buying things, but at least I stopped her from buying TWO. Hahaha and I'm sure she'll regret aft buying them.tsktsk.
Wj and Wee were late! Had Pastamania and Mango Ice! So nice. Walked arnd for digestion then trained home. Hahaha. I seriously think I need to do smth to my hair. Help me think of smth. My mum don't let me chop it off though. I want my short hair! But my mum refused to and I don't want to hear her nagging 24/7. RAHHH.

Ok, now I'm watching the 9oclock channel 8 show. And it's damn freaking funny! But the Auntie Automatic is irritating me off. Stupid lah. Ok end alr. Means it's 10pm shit. I wna finish chem! Die. BYEBYE.

It's a great day out with cousins and mum!
photos next time i guess. i'll have a lot of photos to upload then! hehe.
I guess it can be kinda irritating at times when you just fell, yet others are being so lovey. I guess it's all part of being envy. Note it's envy, not jealous. Hahahah.

I quite like my life now, esp how much I'm able to catch up with the people I love, so, I guess taking a break like this is worthwhile afterall. But inevitably, I miss the life I used to have, the lovely times spent. Right now, I'm forced to have only one choice. How I wish things can start all over agn! And I swear, I'll have a mixture of both, promise to nv neglect any of it. But I guess I should just stop having these kind of foolish thoughts cos we cannot turn back time, so things cannot start all over agn. Things can only start afresh. A new start where things can just be perfect for me, where I can make sure I'll nv make the same foolish mistakes agn.

And the only one who can give me this start, is you (:
Say I'm dreaming, say I'm stupid for having this teeny weeny hope in me, I really don't care.It's my decision, my choice. It's always good to not let go totally, at least it allows me to spend some time thinking abt things. And you allowed me to build this little confidence in myself, knowing what I really want and all.
To choose to continue liking you, is more like having a lil' crush like a sweet innocent child trying to understand what is love (:

I'm supposed to be packing for trng camp yet im still trying to upload the photos. i guess i just cant wait to share with my dearests!

Hahaha, it's really a fun day with Gays. Carls' Junior and hair cut AGN at the same place. hahaha, well, i guess their hair just turned out fine! Some fo the pics are with me but i just cant seemed to upload them shit.Then walked arnd and got this anklet which really looked so tribal! and then to Chatsworth International for the friendly game. Which i think it really sucked alot. and somehow, it wasn't as tired as i expected it to be! perhaps i got used to this kind of games during trng. But seriously, the mo qi just isnt there yet, i guess we really need to work on that.

They had long john for dinner, wee and i just sat there and talked. Then me wee sy walked to Taka Basement to get wee's dinner then got like a bottle of free coke zero. Then parted with sy and the both of us trained home, and finally we got to talk like how we used to on our bus rides home from tk! It seriously felt like I miss Gays so much and havent been catching up with them. And yes I had a great time today. And i guess i should make a greater effort to try and meet them whenever i can cos they are the ones whom i really cherished and love. So yea Cheers to our Gay-ness.

And i guess things will be fine. How can it not be fine after I took such a long time to sort out things! Whtevr it is, still that sentence: Let nature runs its course and im sure things will be fine (:

It's good to have made up my mind and decided on what I really wna do.

Kept asking myself 'what's the point of this and that?' Maybe sometimes, having some time to think alone is good. Even if i have to cry and be unglam, it's gd to have sorted out all my thoughts, which, on the other hand, made me feel more relaxed and relieved. And I don't have to suffer so much anymore. It's ok to be emo at times, but not always. that's why i needed some time alone to think. it's ok to think abt it at times, cos we are humans and have our brains to think.so definitely we will think and emo abt it (if you don't then you really ain't human). But I guess this just makes me stronger, also reminds me not to rely too much and not to make the same mistakes ever agn. I guess it just serves as a good reminder huh (:

It really feels good to have sorted out everything. Cos I've alr taken out the first step by deciding on what to do. Whether to carry out or not, it will depend on individual, but for me Yes, I'm stubborn. so once I've decided, I'll carry it out even if others think its wrong and i think its right. It's my decision afterall!

I seriously think that I've really gained and learnt alot from this whole process. Grown-up? Hard to say but I knw I have matured alot from all this suffering and pain brought to me, and I guess it's all worthwhile (:

Meeting Gays tmr before Friendly against Chatsworth International. Havent been seeing them in a long time. and finally I can make it! Pics up tmr. Shit I need to pack up for Intensive Trng Camp alr! Sunday is the camp. and I havent packed. I have totally no idea on what to bring. SHIT SHIT SHIT.

ok whtevr i need to pack. BYEBYE PPL (:

Laughed and laughed like shit at ahem at BK just now.

Now im tired of laughing. and i need a break from everything.

Sch's boring. i only have like one math tutorial at 12pm then civics then lunch then contact time. wells. slack day. Accompanied ruby for acupuncture hmmm,. then back to school for the SportsXcel launch. Addressing all sports pdp ppl and we got our sportsxcel shirt. hahaha. refreshments provided. Yay for the video we made! Hahaha i think ours is one of the nicest? (: HAHAHA CREDITS TO ME AND SEK only (hehehe) cos i absolutely hate pokings.

Ok, then accompanied Zihui to the army market place near golden mile. Bought like 9 hammocks for the camp for those who didnt have one. IT'S FREAKING HEAVY. hahaha, OHOH. our lots are out. Both guys and girls and i have the groupings. hahaha.
For the girls, we're playing against Vjc, Dunman High and Njc.
For guys, we're playing against ACjc, Yjc, Pjc and Vjc.

I have other grpings but abit lazy to type out so just come ask me if you wna knw lor.
I feel rather stressed now cos I've got like one whole term of work to catch up can. My maths, chem, econs and perhaps geog? Maths and Chem ARE MUST. econs not that bad. Geog is ok since i took it in sec sch. so i have the basics for H1 geog. But I seriously cant find much time for myself, 24hrs is really not enough and I'm really suffering from lack of sleep.

Shit, Ms Ang accidentally elbowed me during the game ytd and hit the part between my eyebrows, er. specifically just above my nose bridge. I THINK IT'S LIKE BRUISE THERE. blueblack or smth like that cos i cant frown and i cant touch it. it hurts my head and my nose lah! bloody shitty painful. im damn sad.

I can't help it but feel sad thinking back abt the past. Abt my happy life, and abt my happy family.
Cos I'm no longer happy anymore.

YES FIRSTLY HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHERMY! (: YOU TURNED 17 SO QUICKLY. BUT IT'S GNA BE MINE SOON (: HOPE YOU ENJOY YOUR BIRTHDAY OVER THERE OK (: GAYS LOVE YOU! DROP US AN EMAIL OR CHAT ON MSN! :D

RAHHHH school officially starts tmr with the new timetable. alright, my class is fine. 13/08 well it's kind of a cool class. hahaha and i supposed i'll get to love them soon.

Anw, went out to meet maysze at Marina Square. She helped me with my chemistry and we watched The Leap Years and it freaking hell made us cried.and then I wondered, how long has it been since I last cried in the cinema. Well, basically I think the show is HEARTBREAKING yet TOUCHING. Ok and I heard all the sniffs and saw all the ppl wiping their tears away. two girls beside may were crying just like us and the girl beside me was crying and hugging her bf while her bf comforted her. Hahahaha. RECOMMENDED! though my mum thinks it's an YI SHU PIAN. like what the! hahaha.

Wells, talked abt our lifes and ate jap ice cream. I knw you meant well Maysze, but I guess I need time to figure out what I really really want and need alright? I knw there are always consequences for my actions but I'm willing to accept them. Say I'm stubborn, say I'm stupid but I really need some time.

and well for the time being, I really need to concentrate on my chem! hahaha cos chem lecture test is coming up and I really suck at chem cos I missed out on one whole chunk of work since I didnt take it for the first intake. I've got like one of term of work to catch up seriously.
Lemme see.
Monday trng,
Tuesday P.E and trng,
Wed FREEEEEE,
Thurs P.E and trng,
Friday FREEEEE,
Sat friendly with Chatsworth International,. suck right? but it's not the end yet! Though it's march hols. but aft sat's frenly,
Sun- Tues I HAVE BBALL INTENSIVE TRNG CAMP. what the shit. Then I dno if there'll be trng but Fri friendly with UWC,
Sat T-net trng.

How much extra time can i have to study except during the intensive trng camp cos they set aside 3hrs every night aft trng to study which i don't really think i will. RAHHHHH. I guess these are all for me to loose all the flabs. Yay i'll be real skinny by then HAHAHA. plus my appetite not very gd. omgggggggggggggg. It's kind of scary to think of the trng camp aft what sek and Zh told me.

Well, I realised I really miss alot alot of ppl, esp the GAYS. Cherm and Ama are in Melbourne now and my lousy phone cannot video call. Jy, Wee, Siqi and Jia! Always organise on some days when I cant meet. Rahhhhh. Foursome too, though Jo is in the same sch HAHA. Siqi and Janice both in Mjc.
and and and my wonderful cousins/friends Ps! I wonder what's gg on in her life now, I mean bcos of my busy schedule I hardly get to see her too. It's like a miracle that I got to meet up with May today.Shucks Jc life is terrible. I feel so NO LIFE. Luckily I've got ppl in TJ to acc me. and my teammates too. HAHA so life isnt that terrible afterall cos my snrs quite dote on jnrs. haha.

Well I have a packed schedule but it's not as if i'm spending them with ppl i dont like, so i guess it's fine with me really.
Sigh, I dont wna rush things but neither wld i wna be an emo kid and emo whole day long. No, I'm not gna do that. I'm gna look on the bright side of life and hope for things to be better. Cos i knw it will. Say I'm stubborn but I strongly believe in my own stand.

Omg this sucks lah.

I have a chem lecture test next week ): but i havent studied for it. I dont even understand atomic structure lah. it's so confusing. tested on atomic structure and mole concept. RAH I DON WNA FAIL IT PLS. Didnt take chem for first intake, so i guess i really missed out on alot. now they are teaching chemical bonding. work just piles up seriously.

Quarrelled with my mum ytd cos i reached home late at abt 12. Think she pms la. She actually gave me a curfew of 9pm. HAHA do i look like i'll obey it? whatever la, guess as long as i inform her where i go and stuff it'll be alright though i really feel so restricted. like don't treat me like a pri sch kid anymore pls!

Rah, I'm finally gg out with may tmr AND looking forward! :D I've got so much to tell her. My left thumb is like zzz now. oh wells. ok blog next time bye.

It's bleeding like mad.